hello from london [part twenty-seven]

hello friends

so umm yes i might not write for awhile. it is not a big deal. i thought about what i could tell you today but i have nothing interesting. i am letting work take over my life right now. the e k online store is all i think about. s came back this weekend. i saw him yesterday and today. i prepped roll-your-own-vietnamese-rice-paper-rolls with marinaded tofu for dinner last night. die! he helped me make a flourless chocolate cake. mercy! you can find it here. we had drinks with his friends at a wetherspoon, kind of like a rsl but less old people. you can buy a schooner for £1.99. cheap! in the morning we had breakfast with some more friends at a turkish eatery, very delicious. and then he left. i decided to give my feelings one last chance to voice themselves and i said "i would move mountains for you", my line from the last update. i wish i heard what he said into my hair. i cried, he held me and kissed my face. why we are not together? i loathe you, distance! i feel he is my punishment for all the times i treated boys badly. damn it must have been a lot of boys. after he left, i allowed myself an afternoon at the cinema and saw milk. i wish i liked it more. sean penn is amazing, the biopic is well-executed [spliced with archival footage], but it was too long and when my attention drifted i would get teary.

so you get the picture. if i keep writing to you in this state, all my updates will be about me crying over a boy and that just gets boring after awhile. i know i will get over it but right now there is an ache in my bones and i do not want to write about it all the time.

if rebecca were here, instead of across the sea with you, i would feel better. she would have told me to stop crying already and we would be drinking fennel tea, playing pick-up sticks, and watching movies. then i would be telling you about all the things i have to look forward to, like london fashion week. our show is on february 22. excitement city! the new range looks so good. there is no way my clothing allowance will cover all the things i want. the hussein chalayan retrospective just opened at the design museum and i really want to go to that. my friend bahbak is djing at club pacific in a few weeks time and then on saturday is work it players lounge, a 90s hip hop night at the ica [sort of like the mca but smaller and less art]. there is a slim chance aki and i can go to paris fashion week with the team in march but she thinks it is more than likely we will have to stay back and run a sample sale. boo! oh well, one can dream! i am very excited about coming home in june. i wish it were tomorrow.

miss you! love you! when i write to you next there will be no mention of crying, promise!

o